“My eyes just want to cryyyyyy!”

When my little guy is sad and doesn’t really have the words to communicate why, he will often cry fat, steady tears and exclaim “My eyes just want to CRY, momma!” and it both breaks my heart and delights me in it’s adorableness.

And that is why I found myself both crying tears that I couldn’t control and laughing like a maniac at the doctor’s office this week, completely not capable of reigning in either emotion.

Adoption makes you crazy, apparently. And my eyes just wanted to cry.

We are in dossier mode. A dossier is the packet of all the things that gets sent to our son’s country and presented to the courts. It’s what represents our legal, financial and emotional fitness to add a child to our family, without the ability to be physically present and try to communicate how much we love this brown eyed, crooked grinned little man. It feels much more vulnerable than I anticipated to prepare the last pieces and send it for translation.

It appeared during the week that every last piece would be in our hands by Friday but the physician’s office made another clerical error that is costing us time. I am actually not complaining about them, just the situation. Adoption paperwork isn’t something they are often asked to do and it can be a little confusing, but when they came back out of the office with missing pieces still… I literally started crying like I was an overtired toddler. Well, worse, because I am an overtired middle aged woman. HA. So I tried to explain away my insanity by saying “sorry… my eyes just want to cry!” and then started laughing. And then just backed away slowly and told them I would see them Monday. Sigh.

When I pick up that last form, I will take them straight to Richmond to the secretary of the commonwealth to be apostilled. That is basically like an international notary? I think? Stating that the state notary that signed all of these documents is legit. Silliness, right? But whatever, man… I always tell friends that there is really no point in complaining about any step of it… it is what it is and you can either do it or not. Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. I just am praying that this step is smooth because I am so tired.

From there, our dossier and around $11,000 will leave our hands. We will be just about at the end of the race here, stateside, and they will pick up for us in country. We will also have paid the bulk of our adoption fees, which will be a tremendous relief. We submitted our immigration paperwork (there are two halves, so this is the first one) and will be summoned to USCIS sometime in the next few weeks to have more fingerprints and then our checklist will be complete. It’s surreal.

On January 2, I set a goal of having our dossier complete by March 21 (World Down Syndrome day) and while I knew it was a lofty goal at the time, I almost made it! We are coming to get you, little guy!

Totally random pictures from my birthday this week. Dad helped the kiddos bake a cake, and God provided a snow day. Super relaxing and quiet!

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