Jesus loves pottery barn


We have Lucas’s space complete and honestly, it is hard to be around. It feels like suspended animation, or a space that was evacuated. It feels like a reminder of losses before him, and in the same way, it feels weird to think about changing, too. His “L” hangs above his shelf, his crib ready for the soft body of a two year old babe. His drawers full of clothes he will not wear. I really wish that we could show up at his parents door with all of the goodies and say “Surprise!! We are so happy for your family!! We have a few things for you!”

Anyway… I really need a fresh start, which is ridiculously privileged and spoiled and silly, but while Lucas’s space was lovingly constructed of items from the home that hold meaning for us, I want to create something fresh and new and without any sad juju for babyhig. And since she will be sharing a space with our other girls, it means I get to freshen up a whole room, which is basically my favorite thing to do, anyway. I’ve decided that I will not touch the space until after trip one so that I have something happy to occupy my time, but I knew that an item that I really wanted for her was the pottery barn blythe crib. I also knew that I really didn’t want the $1000 price tag, so figured that ultimately I would end up without that blythe crib… ha! I checked craigslist out of curiosity and there was one at a fantastic price in Northern Va, but I am so gun shy after the long road that led us here.

As a business person, I don’t mess with money. I would never in a million years ask someone to hold something that I know is in demand and priced to sell. For some reason, however, I felt the need to message the seller and let her know that we are adopting after failed attempts and I won’t even know until next week if I need this but if it’s still available then to please let me know because I would love to purchase it. I sent the email, cringed at my awkwardness, forgot about it, definitely not expecting a reply. When I finished work for the day and checked my email, I was shocked to find this message:

“Hello Stephanie,
I was on the phone with my mom when I happened to get your email.  My mom is my best friend, and I walked along side her through the crazy, yet beautiful roller coaster of adopting two babies. She told me to tell you, from one adoptive mom to another, to take a leap of faith and set up your baby’s room. This advice was given to her when there was no baby in sight, after she went through a very long and discouraging set of setbacks of failed pregnancies. So with no baby in sight, and no adoptions on the horizon, she put up her crib, rocker and changing table and put on the wall the last decoration that said, “Miracles, believe in them.” Twelve weeks later through miraculous set of events, her baby, Faith, was home in her arms. Five years and two failed adoptions later, they welcomed home their second miracle baby, Ruby. 
With that being said, you do not have to buy my crib, and I will hold it for you till the eighteenth! But, if you want to set up the crib, be encouraged, it is only a matter of time before you bring your baby home. I believe this so much, that I would be willing to buy the crib back if plans change. 
Let me know if there is anything I can do to help.”
Included was a picture of the girls.
I had chills. What are the odds?
her signature caught my eye, and I made a mental note to google her company but didn’t get around to it until this morning. As I sat down to jot down this post I decided to look it up. I’m not surprised but I am blown away by the tagline:

Our goal is to spread hope and catalyze growth in the community of those with learning differences.

The “star” of the website is a young woman with down syndrome.


I don’t think I have anything else to say, but I KNOW this is a part of the story. Thank you, Lord, for reaching right into my heart that has been trying to be brave and reminding me that you are holding it in the palm of your hand. And also for loving pottery barn… because I do, too 😉


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